Gottman Method Couple's Therapy Level 1
Personality Dimensions Facilitator
My life completely changed in 2001 when my 25-year marriage, which produced four amazing sons, abruptly ended. It was a traumatic experience that I was not emotionally equipped to handle, and it sent me on a long journey of healing. The pain was overwhelming and the loss unbearable. I was later diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder, and as the layers of healing unraveled over time, I was eventually able to capture the happiness I deserve. I took something that was ripped, stripped, and broken and created a more deserving life! Through personal development programs and counselling, I rediscovered the hope and self-confidence that had all but disappeared. I was aching to be the person I once was: full of laughter and joy, with long-forgotten hopes and dreams. In 2007 I was remarried, we share six grown children and twelve amazing grandchildren. Our fun times now include hanging out with the grandkids, or my husband and I out riding our Harleys together! Life is good!
I’ve had the privilege of working in a therapeutic community since September 1, 2005, when I began my career as the Administrator in a highly specialized center in Langley, practicing the theories of world renown relationship expert John Gottman of the Gottman Institute. I organized various ‘Gottman Couple’s Workshops’, while also completing the Gottman Level 1 training. In this role, I was able to use my training in ‘Personality Dimensions’ to further educate couples who had completed their online personality profiling. I was trained to recognize and help people understand the differences in their personalities that are major contributing factors to relational issues. As I’ve developed both personally and professionally, I have found it a real eye-opener, discovering just how different we all think and feel.
In 2010, I advanced to managing an Emotionally Focused Therapy counselling center in Langley that specialized in complex trauma. I learned so much while working there. I now see the world through a completely different lens. No more judgments as I look at people struggling in life. I know there is always a story behind the brokenness. Often this means looking beyond negative behaviour patterns and recognizing the faces of trauma. My passion is in reaching out and connecting with hurting people and letting them know they aren’t alone. Whether they are stuck in a painful past, an unhealthy relationship, grieving an emotional loss, or sucked down into a pit of helplessness and hopelessness, I want to be there to offer support and encourage them on their journey. When it comes to feelings, I’ve learned it’s never about being ‘right’ or ‘wrong’, it’s always about understanding each other’s perspectives and communicating our feelings in a healthy and constructive way. I want to be there to support and encourage people on their journey to living the life they have always wanted. Seeing life-changing transformations is what makes my job so rewarding! I love to share what I’ve learned, giving people hope and encouragement.
Having worked with so many hurting and traumatized people over the years, I am easily able to recognize sadness in people’s eyes. I can listen to a story and know there’s a bigger ‘root’ story to it all, they just need a safe place to share it. For some, life has literally crushed their spirit and left them in a dark lonely place. Their damage most often comes from early childhood attachment issues or physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. Many of these grown children/adults have completely given up, and self-medicate themselves through drugs, alcohol, or sex, in pursuit of emotional survival. I’ve worked beside some amazingly dedicated counsellors; whose tears literally flow for their clients. That’s the type of team you can expect to have at Fraser Valley Counselling! With validation and encouragement, people are able to find the strength to miraculously transform their lives. This specific office in Langley became a well-recognized training center for master’s level interns and post-graduate clinical residents recruited from Trinity Western University, The University of British Columbia, and Adler University. One of my responsibilities as the Director of Operations and Administration was recruitment and administrative training. I was the liaison between clients, interns, and clinicians. Over the years, it was this role that brought out my passion to open my own center here in Abbotsford. I want to further expand the internship program throughout the lower mainland by opening another center that works with graduate-level student interns providing affordable counselling services for all who seek support. I’ve always had a heart for those who have been less fortunate, and who’ve been judged, neglected, and fallen through the cracks of receiving fair services. I am passionate about having the opportunity to support and validate everyone who steps foot in our offices.
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